Friday, May 22, 2009

I used to love computers

I have just spent an hour creating this space. My eyes are weary. However, I believe that it is important for me to explain why I created this space. Certainly, I love to hear the sound of my voice pontificating on matters of great importance. However, for five years I have been without a larynx and speaking has been a problem.
Recently a friend invited me to join Facebook. What the hell, I'm disabled, I've got nothing better to do.
Then, out of the blue, my friend forwards a message from my former wife, with whom I have had no communication for 35 years. Apparently on some site I was listed as RIP. Well, to be honest, these past few years I have felt RIP.
This communication led to a renewed connection to my former wife (The Beautiful Linda) and my two daughters.
This part is difficult. I abandoned wife and daughters to pursue my addictions. Throughout the years, I have made attempts to find them, but these attempts were futile if not feeble.
I am now faced with having to accept my guilt, shame and remorse and, at the same time, acknowledge the very deep connection that these three women have with me.
Now a new journey begins. I fear it as much as I welcome it. It's 11:30pm here in Arizona, and I am growing tired.
I have set up this Blog in the hope that I can tell Linda, Jessica, and Kristen the truth of my life. They deserve the truth.

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